Dealing with guilt: how can we be kind to ourselves?

Tuesday 19th September 2023 – 8pm (BST)

One of the biggest emotional challenges I’ve faced since becoming a parent through donor conception has been the feelings of guilt I’ve experienced relating to using an anonymous donor to conceive.

I wanted to hold this session because I know many others who feel this way too and that there’s little support out there as to how to navigate the complexity of emotions when this may lead us to feel more anxiety about how our children may react, regret for taking a choice away from them and even shame, with some online forums placing blame on recipient parents for these choices.

The very wise and hugely compassionate Julianne Boutaleb, perinatal psychologist and founder of Parenthood in Mind, joined us to explore this in more depth, with a focus on what is and isn’t within our control, how we can be kind to ourselves and how we can process these emotions and deal with any guilt we may feel. We also talk about how we might learn to express these feelings to our children as we explore the implications with them.



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Speaker Bio

Julianne Boutaleb

Julianne is a highly experienced perinatal psychologist, who has worked for over 17 years in the NHS and in private practice with individuals and couples adversely impacted by infertility issues. As a member of BICA, she lectures and writes on how individuals and couples who are trying to conceive (TTC), pregnant or parenting following ART (IVF, ICSI, donor conception, surrogacy) or adoption may be psychologically affected.

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